Shit Stories Part III

Let’s talk about the last time I soiled my pants. The last time that I had shit in my pants was when I was ten years old at the CN Tower (tourist attraction in Toronto). I actually don’t remember too much about that day. It would appear to be a repressed memory but it wasn’t THAT bad as far as I could remember. There was definitely shit, but not a lot. It was during lunch and I had to go to the washroom to clear the situation. I remember feeling a lot of shame because I felt I was too old to be shitting myself, especially in public. I don’t remember much else.

Are you hiding anything embarrassing? Are you sure you were ten?

Are you hiding anything embarrassing? Are you sure you were ten?

However, I can remember the last time I pissed my pants in full detail. I was six years old and it was a bed wetting incident. I blamed it to having drank a cup of water before bed and for a decade after, I would never drink anything within two hours before going to bed. I vividly remember the dream I had that night. In the dream, I was in a public washroom with four urinals. I was the only one there and decided to make a game out of it and pee in each urinal equally. I would pee in the first urinal for two seconds, stop, turn to the second urinal and pee in that for two seconds and so on. After the third urinal, I woke up and realized that I was actually peeing in real life too. I wonder if I was also peeing in two second bursts in real life. Since then, every time I’ve had a dream where I was peeing, I would wake up instantly and check if I’ve peed myself again. I was always surprised and relieved to find that I was dry. In a sense, I am a little disappointed that the two theories I developed at six years old about bed wetting (the pee dream and the water) have both been debunked.

I'm not hiding anything under these sheets.

I’m not hiding anything under these sheets.

For those who don’t know, I am an unemployed bum adult man-child. I’m pretty much at home 24/7. On several occasions, I’ve gone through the experience of being fine one minute and then urgently needing to shit the next minute so badly that I barely made it to the toilet before shit bursted out of me. I only had to walk 12 steps of the washroom and I always wonder if I weren’t home during these times, would I have shit myself in public?

Yes. Yes you would have.

Yes. Yes you would have.

If you liked what you read, please comment. As a blogger with few followers, I need the affirmation lol.

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