There is no such thing as cold. What we call cold, is simply a lack of heat. I will expand on that later. Don’t worry, I’m not turning into an emotional-poet-wannabe. This is actually about something stupid that I do and my thoughts about it. This is about physical heart pains I experience when I put ice near my chest.
Okay, why the heck is Ted putting ice near his chest? This will take a number of sentences to explain. I bought a beast of a computer recently and placed it in my room, which is pretty small. Being the beast that it is, the computer is huge and generates a lot of heat. But this computer is no dumb beast. It’s a well-built beast so it has tons of fans to keep it cool. As a result, my beastly computer pushes all the hot air into my tiny room.
My computer’s a beast so there’s not much I can do about it. My room isn’t that small and I’m not complaining about its size. It’s just not very well ventilated. Why is it not ventilated? Because the door is closed most of the time. Why is the door closed most of the time? To keep noise from coming in or going out. When my family’s around, they’re loud and I hate them so I would rather not hear them. At night, I try not to make too much noise because I’m a considerate person and I don’t want to disturb them when they’re trying to sleep. There are also handfuls of other reasons why I would want to close the door.
Occasionally, I bring ice packs into the room to cool it down a bit. I used to put the ice packs right next to the beast but then there are lots of pools of condensation water and I don’t want to get it wet. So now, I just put the ice packs on the desk, in front of the keyboard, so that the part of the room near the computer will still be somewhat cooler. That is why I have ice near my chest.
The ice isn’t actually touching my body so it’s not a frost-bitey kind of pain. For some reason, my heart is the thing that’s in pain. As far as I know, I don’t have any heart problems. In fact, I used to be pretty fit. A few years ago, I was running 10km everyday, as a means of transportation. I was a beast. In fact, I feel the heart pain right now. It’s an odd kind of pain. I don’t know what a heart attack feels like, but this feels like the prologue. I guess it feels like I’m dying? I still have the ice packs in front of me so I’m pretty sure that’s the reason I feel the pain, not because the girl from the picture is killing me for continuing to say “beast”.
You know when you do hardcore cardiovascular exercises and your heart hurts because it’s working so hard? It feels a little bit like that but my heart isn’t beating any faster and I’m not breathing any differently. I don’t think it’s beating slower either. Remember the first lines of this entry? Back in high school, a smart girl named Emma sat near me in science class and I overheard her thinking that out loud. Heat is a type of energy and cold is just the lack of that energy. If I try to visualize how the ice packs affect the temperature in the room, I see cold air emanating from it. But cold isn’t a thing, heat is. So the ice packs are actually absorbing the surrounding heat. Energy is flowing towards it, not away from it. With the ice near my chest, it’s literally sucking (heat) energy from my heart.
Maybe the ice packs are causing condensation to happen within my body (maybe in my lungs?). And maybe condensation hurts. Maybe. Or maybe not. I don’t really care. If I cared, I would start by moving the ice packs further away instead of stupidly feeling discomfort. Before I end this entry, I want to warn any new readers I may have. My last couple posts have been more thoughtful and significantly less profane than what I usually write. The next entry is going to be back to being crude. The title will be a dead giveaway so don’t read it if you can’t handle it. If you do decide to read and you find something offensive, stop reading immediately because it’s not going to get any less offensive. People who love my sense of humor is going to love it. I won’t taint this entry with the title, but let’s just say it’s going to be about a handful of things. I have a lot of material which will take several hours to write. I’m deciding whether I should release it in parts or just release one really long entry. If I release in parts, it’ll just mean that you can read it sooner and I’ll still be releasing the full version when it’s done. Basically, if you just read this as my latest blog entry and you want to read more of my awesomeness right NOW, let me know and I will start releasing it in chunks.