Problems I Caused That Are Not My Fault

This past month, there have been three incidents that something bad happened to someone else and it wasn’t my fault. However, I still feel guilty because the bad thing wouldn’t have happened if I wasn’t there. It’s really weird to explain but I’ll just go ahead and describe those incidents.


The first one was me doing that last stand up comedy thing. Without going into too much detail, The psychic got into a fight with his band about bringing me up on stage more and he left the band for a few weeks. I don’t know if I would even do it justice explaining the situation further so I’ll just leave it at that. There was already tension in the band and the fight was gonna happen eventually and it wasn’t my fault for sucking too much or anything, but the specific fight wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t show up to do the stand up gig.


The next incident is when my girlfriend visiting Toronto. We were taking a walk and we were getting home for dinner and I instigated a little run. After running about 10 seconds, I… I just got bored about writing this entry. The topic is still sort of interesting but I lost interest in my examples. I’ll just finish it though. After 10 seconds, I suggested to stop but she kept running and her phone fell out of her pocket and the screen cracked some more. It was already previously cracked and if she had listened to stop running, it wouldn’t have broken. Even still, it’s not really my fault that she didn’t keep her phone safe. I wasn’t sprinting away or anything. Once again, not my fault, but it wouldn’t have happened if it weren’t for me.


The last example is at my friend, Justin’s house. His girlfriend was there and she was sitting with a cup of tea while we were trying to troubleshoot a printer. I had been sickly that day and after a while, I gestured being tired and she offered for me to sit on the couch too. The couch was messy and whilst moving to make room for me, she knocked over her tea and broke the cup. Just like the theme of this whole thing, it wasn’t my fault, but it wouldn’t have happened if I weren’t there.


I don’t know how to feel about all this. Today also marks the 6th day I’ve got all diarrhea so I guess this is the story of my life going to shit.

2 thoughts on “Problems I Caused That Are Not My Fault

  1. It’s all your fault. You should never leave the house again or have anyone over. Don’t talk to anyone either. Don’t even look out the window because someone might look at you and walk into a pole. I was going to go take a shit but your post popped up so I ended up shitting my pants. It’s your fault. You owe me a new pair of underwear. Express Priority service please.

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