I like to experience new things. I was thinking about that concept the other day on a micro level. A specific example would be TV shows. As much as I enjoy rewatching shows that I love, I much rather choose to watch shows I haven’t watched yet in hopes to experience a wider variety… of tv shows. The desire to try new versions of things applies to pretty much everything: food, activities, etc. But then I was thinking about cheating on someone and how that’s along the same lines of wanting to experience more new things. Since cheating is obviously bad, it made me wonder whether or not it would be better to not desire new things that much. Of course, things are compartmentalized and I can want to try new things without necessarily wanting to try new partners and cheating. But there’s still a connection there.
I should probably be the last person to worry about this because I don’t have a partner to cheat with, or cheat on.
Cheating is the act of breaking a rule and trying to get away with it. If you’re not trying to get away with it, then you’re not cheating. I can think of two reasons why someone would want to break the rules on purpose. The first reason is that the consequences for breaking the rules is desirable. An example would be if someone got stuck in a competition that they don’t want to participate in, they can break the rules and get disqualified to get out of it. The other reason for blatantly breaking rules is to show disrespect towards the entity that is sanctioning the rules. Just to be thorough, I guess there’s also a third reason where the person is breaking the rules due to ignorant dumbassery.
Cheating becomes ambiguous when the rules are not clearly defined. That is the case for couples. Now I’m not suggesting that new couples should clearly define what constitutes as cheating for them. That doesn’t work because once you define a set of rules, that means everything else is fair game. It would be silly to expect horny people getting together to design airtight rules. Even thousand page laws have loopholes.
Without the exact set of rules, sometimes it’s hard to know if you’re cheating or not. Just because you have sex with another person, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re cheating. There are happy wife swappers and swingers out there. It’s within their rules, so it’s not cheating. The only other way to determine whether a person is cheating is to see whether they’re being sneaky about it. If they’re doing something that they don’t want their partner to know, then it’s probably cheating. It might not be, but it probably is. It all depends whether you believe a person should be innocent until proven guilty, or guilty until proven innocent.