Ungratefulness

I can appear ungrateful at times. It’s not because I’m depressed or that I’m douchebag. I’m probably not any less grateful than anyone else. It’s all about what the individual values. I’m living at my aunt’s house right now and she’s making me breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Sometimes it would take quite a bit of time and effort to make these meals. I try to say thanks, but it’s really, REALLY forced. I simply don’t feel very thankful for the food. I feel a little thankful, but not very much. I’m not complaining that the food tastes bad or that I’m godly and don’t need to eat or anything. I’m not picky about food, at all. I know that I get more enjoyment out of frozen foods and they take less effort to make so proper meals just feel like wasted effort. I’m also a pretty badass defroster.

Okay, so far, I just made myself sound like an asshole. Now let me turn the table around. My aunt doesn’t play or appreciate video games. I have a shit load of top notch video games ready for her to access. At the snap of a finger, I can let her play the best games on the best systems, a privilege that many people don’t get. She’s even less grateful for this than I am of food. I’m not saying she needs to be grateful about it. She doesn’t. She couldn’t give less of a shit about video games and that’s perfectly fine. In fact, it’s normal. Video games is a bit of an extreme example and I didn’t prepare them just for her. But I’ve also prepared access to Chinese TV and movies on my computer that she’s not using and isn’t grateful of. I hate Chinese shit so that’s not for me at all. Again, I’m not saying she needs to be grateful about it. But just as she’s not grateful about these, I shouldn’t have to be grateful about food.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not crazy retarded. I do understand that there’s a bit of a difference between constant daily meals and media. But the difference in gratitude is a lot less than what you might first assume. I’m also not just making excuses to be douchey. I’ve been voluntarily doing all the dishes. It’s not exactly an equal exchange for the meals, but at least it’s better than not doing the dishes. And it’s not like I can’t be a very grateful person. It’s just that no one has ever given me what I want. If a girl ever offers me sex or cuddling, I’d be super grateful, so grateful that I’ll probably make it awkward. No one has ever offered me that so it’s no surprise that I’m not very grateful of life. Heck, if my cousins gave me full tit access, that would already get me to maximum gratefulness. …One day, I should stop talking about incest.

Advertisements