There Are Haters, And Then There Are Assholes.

So… I released a game last week. It’s just a limited release and got over 50k views in a week, blah blah blah. It’s not wildly successful or anything, but it’s nothing to scoff at either. Going in, I knew that the world was full of stupid people but it seems I couldn’t predict how stupid people can get. Stupidity truly knows no bounds. There are a lot of haters who’ll just hate shit for no reason. They’re annoying, but they don’t really bother me much. Haters are like farts. Like a douchebag passing by and farting a cloud in your face. As much as it sucks, it goes away in a few moments. But then there are assholes that are made of pure hate. Unlike haters and their farts, these assholes take a full shit in your house and you have to go out of your way to clean that shit up. Sure, you can ignore the shit and just wait for it to decompose into dust, but that’s not very good. …I’m not sure if the analogy holds up at this point. I also don’t know why I always use shit in my analogies.

Anyway, I encountered a giant asshole today. Right off the bat, the site seemed a little off. Most places probably have less than 10% assholes and the rest of humanity is usually surprisingly pleasant. This site seemed to have at least 90% asshole. I’m slowly putting the pieces together and it kind of makes sense. The site specializes in finding web games, creating cheats for them, and posting the game on their site with the cheats. The staff seems to have the decency to keep my ads within the game, so they’re not “stealing” anything from me. But then I should’ve realized that players who seek out cheats for games have no integrity and that carries over to all aspects of life.

I try to respond to every comment. Whenever I comment, I always want someone to respond to them and I felt like I should deliver that to as many people as possible. If I didn’t care about people reading my comment, then I wouldn’t make the comment at all. If the comment is a little shitty, I still try to respond positively, giving the person the benefit of the doubt. If a comment is really shitty, I just ignore them because I know people are retarded and there’s no point in engaging them. However, one particular comment stuck out to me a little. I could easily just ignore it, but I felt like pissing him off for fun. I can easily detach myself conversation and maybe the drama will draw some people in. Bad publicity is good publicity and all that jazz, you know?

This is the first comment that caught my attention:

Damn tedgaming, are you of such low self esteem that all you have is the desire to troll your a$$ off and making weird almost nonsensical comments towards anyone and everyone? Dude we get it, you “made” this game, and you think it’s top notch.

I responded with this:

What kind of imbecilic retard reads comments and then complains that there are comments? I’m making sure that the game’s working and offering info about the game. Wtf are you doing here? Are you of such feeble mind that you need to female dog about dust?

That last line was a product of the site’s censorship. It was supposed to be “bitch about shit” instead of “female dog about dust”. His response is:

I guess I rest my case. At no time in your incoherent ramblings did you make any sort of sense. Are you Drunk? Drugging? Both? Just do us all a favor and crawl back in that dark hole you call a home, and STFU. Thanks for shopping, bye-bye now…

I respond with: (I hate these I respond, he respond lines, lol.)

I’m sorry that you lack the ability to comprehend logic and simple censorship.

He said:

Just giving u the FYI, it seems that the only person alive that will listen 2 u is urself. I guess marveling @ your own magnificent’s knows no bounds it will continues till one day you realize that ur the only 1 around who will believe ur own bs

Then I said:

If I were a troll, then I would’ve succeeded in trolling you. Touche to you for trolling me too. I don’t get how you can be so blind to that.

He just wrote another response but it’s riddled with grammatical errors and nonsense. I think I broke him. Oh, and I forgot to mention the weirdest part of this. The first comment I quoted was actually this guy’s 2nd comment to my game. His first comment was:

This is a pretty good game. I do like the blood gore, especially when u do headshots or using ur grenades. IDK if it’s ppl’s setup, maybe the reason ppl r having probs w/loading is their web browser. Firefox, or I.E seems 2 b crap w/Larger games.

I expected his kind of behavior from someone who didn’t like the game, but this guy just seems like a total mess. I’m bored with him now. If he tries to instigate shit again and it’s amusing, then I’ll write another blog post about it. He probably won’t be very amusing though.

False Resentment

It’s easy to resent people for not accepting you when you’re not at your best. But at the same time, I can’t really blame them. If/when I get successful and girls from my past start getting more interested in me, I would wonder where the fuck they were when I needed them the most, like right now. But then nobody would want to be with a shitty excuse of a person like me right now so it’s not really their fault either.

When you’re in a better place, you won’t resent the new people you meet because they did not reject you when you were at your low. But they didn’t have to because they never got to see it. If they saw you at your low, they would probably reject the shit out of you. Chances are, the old friends you resent are actually better friends to you but emotions trick you into hating the ones you should love and loving the ones you should hate.

Discrimination and Internet

From time to time, I voice my opinion about gay people, retarded people, or people of other ethnicities, usually black. The problem is, I don’t know any gay retarded black people and I also don’t know anyone who’s gay or retarded or gay. Oops I typed gay again. I meant black. Due to my lack of interactions with these people, my opinions are completely baseless. I mean, who knows… maybe after meeting some of these people, it turns out that I really hate them. Maybe I haven’t been discriminating enough.

All kidding aside, I honestly don’t have much of an opinion on these matters. Although I wrote something negative about a race, I don’t think it’s actually racist. That’s because the butt of the joke isn’t the gays or the blacks or the retards; the butt of the joke is me for being so wildly ignorant and stupid. Too bad there are so many people on the internet that’ll go right ahead and get offended at the sight of some of these words.

Speaking of the internet, I hate my internet. I switched internet service providers recently and the new one sucks. Basically, whenever I download something, I can no longer load new pages. That means I can no longer download porn while looking for more porn to download while streaming porn on my second monitor. How am I supposed to live this way? What’s that? Meet a real girl you say? Are you out of your mind?

My Life’s Paradoxes Part II

My previous entry on paradoxes of my life was one of the most liked entries so it makes me happy that I thought of more paradoxes to write about. Hopefully I can live up to the high standard I set for myself. My last few posts haven’t generated as much likes and followers as my earlier ones so my writing quality might be decreasing or it could just be random factors coming into play that people aren’t seeing the blog. I’m thinking it’s the latter because there’s no way I’m not awesome. By the way, I have an irrational desire to be completely original. I hate feeling that there’s a chance I copied someone or even simply inspired by them. Even when I retell the same story, I have the need to change the words up, usually for the worse because I already perfected the story the first time. That said, this first paragraph irked me because I’m playing Final Fantasy XIII-2 right now and there’s a retardedly named character, Hope, and a poorly named phenomenon they call paradoxes. Just the fact that I used both these words irks me… Yeah I know, I’m a fuckin’ mess.

Speaking of games, the first paradox is my love-hate relationship with video games. I grew up enjoying video games but as I became smarter and wiser and funnier and awesomer, games became less appealing. I want to like them but the games give me a hard time loving them like what happened with Atelier Ayesha that I wrote about here: Recently, I’ve grown to hate games a lot more than I love them, causing me to have loads of shit to complain about in every game I play. The paradox is that I can somehow still manage to play upwards of 15 hours a day, 100 hours a week. The simple explanation is that I have absolutely no life with absolutely nothing better to do so I do something I don’t even like. I only resumed playing games around 2 weeks ago so I wonder how long it’ll take before I burn out from doing so much of something I hate and become depressed and suicidal again.

Speaking of voluntarily doing a lot of what I hate, the next paradox is that I’m a narcissist that hates myself. It kinda makes sense because why else would a narcissist be suicidal? Why would a person want to kill someone he loves? It appears I’ve adopted a writing style where I constantly comment on what I’m writing whilst showing clear signs of narcissism and self-hate. So I will describe my relationship with myself also of the love-hate nature. …And I hate myself for repetitively writing “love-hate”. Once again, there’s more hate than love. I don’t know if there’s any love actually. I might just hate myself a lot less than everyone else, but it’s all just a heap of shitty hatefulness and I happen to be the one standing at the top. Would being on top mean I hate myself more? Fuck it. This was just a shitty metaphor about a heap of shit so it doesn’t need to make sense. This self-hate might explain why I’m doing 100 hours a week of something I hate, why I continue to live instead of carrying out a suicide, and why I’m still fuckin’ living with my parents. …Maybe I’m just too nice of a guy that I don’t want to kill anyone, not even myself.

Speaking of being nice, the last paradox is that I’m a nice person but I’m not friendly at all. I hate smiling at people, I hate small talk, and I hate greeting people. I simply hate people… But I’m nice. It might be hard for you to see how I’m nice when I say things like “it’s okay to make fun of gay and retarded people” in entries like here:

or here:

or here:

The last one is about fat people but fat, retarded, or gay people are all in the nether regions of society so I might as well lump them all together. Lol I have no idea how I can prove I’m nice after saying shit like this. Well, I’m smart enough not to say this stuff in real life so that doesn’t interfere with my niceness. The main reason I consider myself nice is that I do any and all favors that people ask of me. Often times I’ll bend over backwards to help people I hardly fuckin’ even know. I don’t get a sense of pride or joy out of helping people either so that’s why I consider myself fuckin’ nice. Now, why would you ask a favor of me when I won’t even say “hi” to you? Good question. My unfriendliness might be an effective deterrent because I don’t want to be helping people anyway, but I do everything I’m asked. A better question would be why I bother being nice to people if I hate them so much. Maybe it’s my self-hate in the works again by making me do things that I hate, for people that I hate… Watch out guys, you might be witnessing the origin of a super villain here, the lamest origin story of all time: “He was lonely and friendless and blogged until he realized he actually hated people.”