Bored With Words

I got bored and decided to play a word game with myself. The goal is to use homophones and homonyms and whatever homo shit to form the most retarded phrases I can imagine while maintaining grammatical correctness.

Q: Cue the queue.

A: Okay, the cameras are rolling so you should tell the background actors to get in line.

Q: Unflatten my flat flat.

A: You should fix your home to make it livelier. Give it more depth, more dimension.

Q: Plant the plain plane on the plain.

A: You can’t find any airports or roads so you have to land your ordinary air-bus on a grassy field.

Q: Gay gay

A: What do you call a happy person who has a life partner.

Q: Chipped Chip chip

A: A damaged gambling currency made from potatoes.

Q: Crispy crisp

A: What do you call crunchy potatoe chips.

Q: Faggot faggot

A: Cigarettes made for homosexuals.

Q: Fake it, faggot.

A: Telling a gay person to pretend to be straight.

Q: There there, they’re there.

A: What do you say to comfort someone who is worried about people not arriving at the designated area.

Q: Man, man the manhole. Amen.

A: You give a tired prayer in hopes that they fix the sewer.

Q: Ho ho ho. Hoe’s hoes and hose.

A: The name of a shop that sells gardening and farming tools and the owner happens to be a prostitute. And say it in Santa Claus’ voice.

Q: Three free Friezas.

A: A chinese person advertising giveaways of a dragonball character.

Q: The pit’s a pizza.

A: You explain that you marked on the map the location of the hole with an Italian pie.

Q: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

A: I ran out of orginal ideas and decided to become a fuckin’ copycat.

I call this game Homophrase. See if you can come up with more.