Hospital Blog: Let Down By Friend Again

Before I write about the friend, let me do a little hospital update. A new woman got pushed in to occupy the spot next to me. She looks like an old person who looks good for her age. Or maybe she looks old for her age. I wouldn’t know unless I actually know her age which I doubt I’ll find out. There’s not much that’s worth writing about other than the fact that I’m glad I’ve seen a prostitute so that the first boob I’ve ever seen is not the boob of a dying old woman. She was probably operated on recently because she’s naked under the blankets. She tells the nurse that her arm is numb and so I got to see 60% of her boob when they were looking at her arm. She maintained that level of exposure for a long time. I’m not proud to say that I glanced over many times to see if I could see more of the boob. Surprisingly, they were able to keep the nipple perfectly concealed during that entire time. This was not a proud night for me. It would’ve been embarrassing if someone caught me looking and told me to look away.

I feel like anything I say now will have no credibility because I just made myself out to be quite a pathetic perverted loser. Anyway, let me write about this friend that I mentioned in the title. My friendship with him is a bit of an odd one. I met him in high school, in grade 9, when we partnered up for a few science projects. We never chatted in school but we talked quite a bit when I was over at his house working on those projects. We seem like we’re friend-compatible but we never really became friends because neither of us were particularly looking for more friends.

That was pretty much the extent of our interaction in high school. After finishing high school, I got invited out to play soccer, basketball, and other sports quite often because I’m a sporty guy and not a douche and they could always use more players. I met this friend several times during these sport gatherings and we were friendly with each other, but there was no special connection or anything. Within the next 2 years, this guy invited me out to several 1-on-1 activities. We played basketball once, just the two of us. We also played tennis and did 5k runs together several times. I was invited to play Rock Band and other games with him on a number of occasions. I never initiate contact though. He does the inviting every time and I say yes to it every time.

I never thought anything of it but when I think back on those days, it almost seems like he’s making an effort to befriend me and I just go along with it, without putting in any effort of my own. One time, he even invited me to go swimming with him, just the two of us, at night, at his uncle’s condo. In retrospect, that almost sounds like a gay experience. There was nothing gay about it though. We never touched each other, not even accidentally or “accidentally”. I also knew that he had a girlfriend so it didn’t cross my mind that the whole thing might’ve seemed a little gay.

About a year ago, he invited me out to brunch, just the two of us. Okay, I made that sound gay on purpose. It wasn’t actually brunch. It was dim sum which is a Chinese meal between breakfast and lunch so it’s kind of like brunch except it doesn’t have any of the romantic connotations. Chinese restaurants are not romantic at all. I agreed to go at first but for one reason or another, I bailed out in the end. I don’t remember the detail, but it wasn’t a firm “date” and I already ate lunch by the time he contacted me that day. I also didn’t have a car that day. He didn’t offer to drive and I didn’t ask because it wasn’t like I really wanted to go anyway.

This past Saturday, I saw him posting on facebook, asking if anyone wanted to have dim sum with him on Sunday. No one responded and I know exactly how sucky it feels to post something on facebook that everyone ignores so I decided to reach out and ask if he wanted to go with me. He said sure, so I figured we had a “date”. I tried to set up a tentative time with him but he didn’t respond. He continued to not respond until Sunday evening when he said, “Sorry, I had dim sum with my girlfriend. We’ll go next time.”

Is it just me or was that pretty shitty of him? He should’ve at least had the decency to tell me if he was going to cancel instead of making me wait around all day. This is really starting to sound like some gay relationship drama. Not that he’s done this to me before (or at least not that I remember), but it seems all my friends have done this kind of shit to me. Not only do they cancel plans, they play these stupid bitch-hunting games where they don’t respond. Fuck this shit. I don’t need “friends” like these. Is it any wonder why I dislike people as much as I do? Everyone around me behaves so damn disrespectfully.

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Hospital Blog: Art and Writing

Note: There are certain things that make more sense to read on the scans but the transcript is edited and better written. So I’m basically forcing you to read everything twice or more likely, this stuff won’t make sense. …Without a scanner, I took pictures of the scans with my aunt’s samsung galaxy. It worked alright but I didn’t put enough effort to make it look good. This whole blog is a bust… When things are going wrong like this, I just want to call it quits, lol…

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It seems I’ll be spending a lot of time in the hospital for the next few weeks. Don’t worry, I’m not hurt or anything; I’m not the patient. I’m just driving my uncle to the hospital to do dialysis. He has to go 3 times a week and they’re 5 hour sessions. That’s a lot of time for me to sit around so I figured I’d write blog entries while I’m here. I’m writing these old fashion onto a piece of paper. If I had a laptop with me, I wouldn’t be writing freaking blogs for 5 hours.

I will describe the nature of these posts in a bit. For now, I want to take note of this very annoyed patient that’s beside me. In appearance, he’s a grumpy old white man. The first thing I heard out of him was him asking a nurse how much longer he had to wait until his dialysis will begin. The nurse paused for a long time to think of an answer while maintaining a friendly smile. She told him she doesn’t know for sure, maybe 15 minutes. I thought that was a fair answer. If she doesn’t know, she doesn’t know, and she still gave him an estimate to the best of her ability. The grumpy guy tried to bitch about the long wait and the nurse immediately told him, “I’m not your nurse” and walked away. I thought that was brilliant.

These are the kinds of stories you can expect out of this hospital blog series. I don’t know how many variations of grumpy patient stories will pop up so most of it will just be what you normally see from my blog. I will try to scan these papers I’m writing on. The only reason for that is because I’m about to bitch about my handwriting. I wish I had prettier handwriting. If I try really hard to make it look neat, it still looks kind of retarded. It’s fine but it doesn’t look good and I want it to look good. I’m not an artist and I don’t really want to be an artist, but for some reason, I think of myself as sort of an artist. I don’t draw often, but every time I try, I’m a lot better than the previous time I try, without any practice in between.

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Half the time I draw stuff, it looks pretty awesome. However, the other half of the time it looks like a retarded kid drew it. I will demonstrate by attempting to draw a dog… (refer to image)

Okay, that actually didn’t turn out so bad considering I’ve never drawn a dog before. There was a situation a while ago where a kid asked me to draw a dog. I froze and was unable to draw anything. I thought it would turn out more like this: (refer to image) I know these aren’t amazing drawings by any stretch of the imagination, but I think they’re pretty good for a non-artist.

A couple years ago, I applied to a few colleges for animation and game design. I was required to have a portfolio and they said it was okay to draw anime characters so I drew a few. Two of them look really good (especially by non-artist standards) and the rest were kind of crap but they were still alright. You can see them here. (After hyperlinking it, I don’t know how I feel about these pictures anymore. Maybe there’s just 1 good one, lol.)

good vegeta

…This turned into a mini self promoted art gallery but that wasn’t my original point. I went from handwriting to art because I have some form of mild artistic proficiency but I’m unable to translate that into writing. Why can’t I write as good as I draw? It’s essentially the same thing if I focus purely on making it look good, but I can’t do it. Let me try again… Nope… (That makes more sense when you look at the scans.)

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Anyway, the grumpy old guy is still bitching about the same shit. I feel bad that people like him exist. Either he doesn’t know that he’s ruining other people’s days or he doesn’t give a shit that he’s ruining them. Either way, his presence is no good. Now I feel a little guilty for that rant because he just thanked a nurse for bringing him a blanket like a normal decent human being. (Sketch of grumpy guy) That’s what the grumpy guy looks like. Imagine all the hair being white. I don’t know how I would draw white hair with a pencil. …I surprise myself at how well the sketch turned out. Again, I know it’s not brilliant but at least it doesn’t look like the shit that I expected to turn out. I expected it to look like this: (crappy shit sketch)

I tried to take a picture of the grumpy guy. The only camera I had on me was my ps vita so I tried using it. I pointed the camera towards him and right before taking the picture, I decided to point it down to test and see if it makes the stupid camera sound. Turns out, the vita makes a super loud camera sound at max volume even though I muted it and plugged in headphones. Good thing I did the test, otherwise it would’ve been super obvious that I took a picture. I couldn’t figure out how to turn the sound off and it can’t zoom so it was just a piece of shit. I later tried to use the vita to take pictures of the scans to email it to myself but it turns out the vita camera is super low res and you can’t read the text. Pure piece of shit…