Quick Burst of Thoughts

I just realized that when I talk to adults, I refer to my mom as “mommy” which sounds pansy but it’s better than the alternative of calling her a cunt.

 

I hate clubbing but the one part I do enjoy about it is that I can fart freely on the dance floor and no one will know.

 

When adults talk to me, it’s annoying when they say something to me with the presumption that I enjoy playing video games. I don’t. I don’t enjoy anything in life anymore. The only reason I still play games is to numb my mind. Even then, I can barely keep it up. So when they start a conversation saying that I like to play games, I know that I can stop listening right there and start spacing out.

 

Lately, I feel like my weird body hairs are getting longer: armpit hair, nose hair, ear hair, asshole hair, nipple hair, etc…

 

I asked a dude if he would fuck a female bum and was surprised that there was a misunderstanding. That’s when I know I’ve been using the word “bum” for “homeless” too much.

 

I know I’m not gay, but I think I would be willing to give a guy a hand job for as little as $5. There will need to be a couple realistic conditions for me to offer this amazing deal. I wouldn’t have to pretend to enjoy it and I would need to have access to soap and water immediately afterwards. Honestly, I don’t see what the big deal is. I don’t enjoy touching a dick by any means but c’mon guys, it’s just a dick. That’s much better than touching a shitty asshole. Wait a minute… Does this mean I would rather touch a guy’s dick than a girl’s asshole? Umm… I don’t think I want to think about this anymore…

 

Next topic.

 

It is said that the average man uses 7,000 words a day and the average woman uses 20,000 words a day. Who says that? I just quoted the first site that came up on google. Whatever the amount is, I literally use 0 words on an average day. People should be surprised I’m even capable of speaking.

These are the kinds of random little things I plan to talk about in my podcast that I’m still planning to do. Hopefully this little tease will help get me a couple listeners when I finally make it.

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