Games SpoilTED Part II

A Word From Ted
This is a heads up that this entry turned out to be more about gaming than I would have preferred. This is a little warning for non-gamers that they might not enjoy this entry as much as my other hilarious ones. Personally, I think it’s still funny and interesting enough for non-gamers to read because I wrote it and I’m an amazing writer. Anyway, I just don’t want anyone to read it and feel like they’ve wasted their time. Use your own judgement. You have been warned.

Ni No Kuni

It seems they only have enough budget to do 5% of the voice-overs. I didn’t think I’d mind it this much, but it bugs me a lot. The game is also very slowly paced with a very flawed battle system. My allies and I always get tangled up in a knot and walk into each other, blocking each other’s way from attacking the enemies. It happens in every battle and it’s so annoying that it practically ruined the whole game for me. Somewhere, someone in charge saw this and said it was fine and left this terrible bugginess in the game. As a critically acclaimed game, it’s terrible. This would be a great game to stumble upon with no expectations but if you even expect it to be adequate, you might get disappointed.

Dragon Ball Z Ultimate Tenkaichi

I went into this game without knowing what dragon balls are and was thoroughly confused by the game. Just kidding, I’ve play too many Dragonball Z games to count so I’m technically a fan. I have fond memories of watching the anime as a child but I think a lot of that is lost in the modern day for someone to see the series for the first time. I’ve only “played” a few hours so far and I plan to finish it but I’ve seen enough that I’m ready to judge. The word “play” was in quotes because I can hardly consider this a game. It’s pure button mashing, even more so than the traditional sense of the word. If you own a controller that can press buttons repeatedly by holding down a button, then you’ve pretty much beat half the game. The other half of the game is simply choose one of two choices and if both players picked the same thing, the attack is blocked. Otherwise, the attack is successful. It is as stupid as it sounds.The fights feel more like I’m telling the characters what to do rather than controlling them and making them do it. There are also bullshit “chase battles” where you “play” the chase scenes with shitty game mechanics.

The moves are flashy and fun to watch. The story mode also has lots of original anime-style cutscenes. It’s basically just watching the show except a lot of animations are repeated. Oh wait, that’s exactly like the anime. Seriously though, the only reason that this is called a game is because you push buttons and it’s not in 30 minute episodes. That said, I do mildly enjoy watching the things the go on in the TV and I’ll probably play the game to its completion unless it somehow pisses me off.