Rant and Wonder

It seems that every so often I decide that I get a little fed up with my parents’ bullshit and I vent about it online. This is another one of those times. About a year ago, I started listening to a lot of podcasts and nowadays, I listen to it on my psp. My hearing is adequate but I wish the psp could go a little louder because sometimes when there are other noises around me, I miss a word or two. It’s audible, but it’s not loud by any measure of the word. Three times now, my dad has wandered towards me and asked me why I have to listen to my things so loudly. Apparently, barely audible is too loud. Then I put my headphones on and my mom nags that I shouldn’t always wear headphones because it’ll make my deaf. Groundless non-fact babbled at me that completely contradicts what the other parent just said. And somehow, they actually don’t realize their own fucked up parenting. Either that, or they notice it but they try to ignore it and not address it because they know they are bad parents and they’re not trying to change that. Not long after, my dad would tell me to cheer up and not be so frustrated with myself and that I’m the only one annoying myself. There are clearly two external forces actively annoying me and yet I don’t know how he’s completely blind to it.

I’m forced to ignore all these retardedness because telling them would accomplish nothing. No wait, I take that back. Telling them off would actually accomplish giving them a reason to hate me and kick me out of the house and I’m not necessarily ready to be homeless or catalyze my prison plan yet. I’ve long since mentally prepared myself for homelessness and come to terms to it, as much as any sane, first-world person can, but I don’t want to actively trigger the event.

Now you might wonder what the “wonder” part of the title refers to. I was playing Dragon Ball Z Ultimate Tenkaichi and just fought Racoome. Racoome is kind of a retard but I just noticed that he’s also kind of flamboyantly gay. That’s when I started wondering about the existence of people who are gay AND retarded. I don’t think I’ve seen any, but they’re bound to exist. People (like me) often make fun of gay people and people (like me) often make fun of retarded people but I don’t think we combine them often enough. Obviously, I recognize that what I just wrote sounds kind of wrong, but it only sounds wrong and isn’t actually very wrong. Louis CK says it very well in this clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fTh9auIVVrA I think that’s from his special Shameless and it’s really funny and I can’t recommend highly enough for you to watch it. If you get any enjoyment out of reading my writing, you must watch that one minute clip because he says it so well. Even if you don’t enjoy my writing, you should watch it anyway because Louis CK is better than me; his fame and fortune and my lack of fame and fortune is evidence of that. We make fun of gay people not because of their homosexuality, but because of their abnormal flamboyant behavior. We don’t make fun of the sex at all because that’s not funny. It’s kind of gross. Actually, all sex is pretty gross. Same with retards. We don’t make fun of them because of their disability. We make fun of their retarded behaviors which happens to be caused by their disability. We don’t make fun of the difficulty they have adjusting to life because that’s not funny. It’s sad. I guess their inability to adjust to social protocol is part of the difficulty they experience…

Hmm… I think I’ve just sorted my thoughts on making fun of people who are different. It’s wrong to bully them and make their lives hard, but it’s okay to make fun of them behind their backs. And I say this as an asian man who has lots of non-asian friends who make fun of my asian-ness behind my back but I’m fine with it as long as I don’t hear it. And I know that these things go on behind my back because I actually have a recording of it. One of my friends stupidly thought it would be funny for me to hear it so he sent it to me. It wasn’t funny (for me…).  But we’re still great friends and the racist recording did not affect that at all.

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